Sometimes I get totally overwhelmed by my life, primarily because I’m a person who compulsively involves myself in many things and in the past, at least, seemed to attract a lot of crisis. The latter is no longer true, thankfully, because I have learned how to detach from unhealthy situations with near lightening speed. However, I still find myself totally in over my head with things to do and people to see and though it doesn’t always feel as though I’m going to be able to handle it all, I not only manage but often exceed all my boundless expectations. In thinking about it, I’ve come to believe that it’s actually a good way to live - especially so for the spiritual side of me. When I live with comfortable margins for excessive periods of time, I find the corners of my being gathering nasty little dust-balls and spiders’ webs; my faith starts to shrink and show signs of unattractive flabbiness. Discontent and ingratitude thrust wispy tendrils into my disposition and I get whiney. I hate being whiney. My ambition level sinks to that of a sea slug and I sigh a lot. I know we need appropriate r & r and self-care so we don’t burn out, but honestly, I do believe I’d rather burn out than fizzle out. Walking the edge is where I find my awareness and experience of the Spirit to be the most keen and exhilarating. I’ve never been a good swimmer but I did learn to float and that made all the difference in my ability to enjoy the beach and boating and to fly over bodies of water. What I’ve experienced of the Spirit’s ability and willingness to buoy me in the turbulent waters of my many life streams, has convinced me that I can take risks with myself and that life abundant is an achievable ambition and I don’t need to be completely in balance or have precise control of the details for this to occur. Truthfully, it’s kind of fun here in the asylum. You meet the most fascinating people.
